I took the day off Thursday because of dentist appointments for the kids, and I needed to drive an hour each way for a piece of necessary paperwork. I enjoy solitary drives to think, process, and plan. The drive Thursday was exactly what I needed. Random thoughts have been going through my head, especially with the upcoming vote in Eastern Europe, our own dossier holding pattern, and questions about when she comes home. My head and my heart battle amongst themselves, and doubt creeps in ever so slowly. I know Sarah will be a part of our family. It's the WHEN that wigs me out. So, this drive was a time for me to process all my thoughts.
I went to a town I've never been, enjoyed the quaintness, and admired the architecture of the courthouse. When I walked in the massive gold doors, magnificent grand staircases were a sight to behold, all decked out in green garland and wreaths. I felt like Scarlett O'Hara walking up to the second floor. A fifteen minute appointment and my deed was completed.
Walking into the dentist office that afternoon, I began thinking of when I'll be bringing Sarah in for her first check-up. After checking in, I sat down and across from me was a middle/high-schooler with Ds. They were there to discuss orthodontia. Earlier, I had read where an adoptive family struggled to find a doctor who would take new patients, especially special needs. I knew I would not have any difficulty with my pediatrician, but had questions about our dentist. What an answer! For me, it was another confirmation that we are meant to be her forever family. It may not have meaning for some. For me, it was a sign that brought peace to my anxious heart.
Each one has to find his peace from within. And peace to be real must be unaffected by outside circumstances. Ghandi